Think You're A Good Driver? You Do The Maths...

When it comes to spelling and grammar, I'm one of those people who you could call "picky". This means that if I see the sentence "your stupid", I'm tempted to reply with "my stupid what?". I froth at the elbows whenever I see or hear the word "irregardless", mostly because it doesn't make any sense. Mis-spell any word that's simple and I will tell Ross Kemp that you've made untoward comments about his Mother, and would happily invite him outside for a spot of pugilism to resolve the issue. Use the wrong "they're/their/there", and I will vigorously campaign to become the next Prime Minister, purely so I can launch nuclear war on your face. I've seen CVs where it seems that, to save paper I'd assume, vowels were judged to be unnecessary and were discarded. Somewhat like their CV, funnily enough. I do get that Dyslexia means some people do genuinely find getting the right words more difficult than others, however it doesn't make you write "hilar". Laziness will do that. Yet if you ask some people whether or not they're good at spelling or grammar, you can practically smell the indifference coming from them.


It's the same with Maths! It seems perfectly fine for someone to start some basic arithmetic, only to give up after a few moments and then declare that something most people master a couple of years after being toilet-trained is so utterly beyond them, that they simply must remove their shoes and socks to complete this complex equation. Last year I retook a Maths GCSE, simply because I could (a good enough reason if any was needed), thinking I was merely "ok" at Maths and wanted a higher grade, and I was met by boundless looks of confusion on everyone's faces, similar to this, when they had to do some really simply sums. It was priceless! The amount of brainpower needed to go into doing somewhat basic addition could've solved the Middle-East Conflict, not work out the cost of a sandwich with 10% taken off. Yet instead of being all coy about it and trying their best to learn, it seems the acceptable response to it is to giggle "oh, I'm no good at this Maths lark" and carry on with their day, joking about how "hilar" it was that they messed up their shopping bill. Not surprising then, that everyone in the UK owes nearly £1.5 trillion between them! Don't forget that this doesn't even include outstanding mortgages, which is nearly that again, meaning that the figure falls in at nearly £40,000 per person in the UK. Wow!

So we're apparently a nation of people who, despite having the Internet sitting in our pockets and, to horrendously paraphrase Cecil Rhodes, have "won first prize in the lottery of life" by the mere fluke of having been born in the Western World rather than Etriea, don't care. Plus, despite living in the 21st Century rather than a time when you would have had a dozen siblings purely for the chance that a few of you might reach adulthood, some are happy to admit that they can't be bothered to recap something that most people figured out before they needed their other hand as well to show how old they were. However, you ask those same people about their driving, and they will act as if they are the living, breathing personification of the Highway Code! Seriously, ask 100 random people to judge their own driving, and I guarantee you that most of them will describe themselves as "above average" which, aside from being statistically impossible, is clearly rubbish to anyone who's actually driven along anything paid for by a Tax Disc. In fact, this has already been done with a whopping 93% of Americans putting themselves in the top 50%. I think it's mind-boggling that when it comes to driving - something that is deadly if you get it wrong - people will wildly overestimate their ability but with something harmless yet essential, like Maths, people revel in ignorance. Can you imagine people walking out of their houses wearing nothing but a shoe on their hand and a glove on their ear while proclaiming that they're "no good at this dressing lark"? So why Maths and English?

Well, it all seems to stems from something called the Dunning-Kruger effect. Basically, people who are very good at a given task will rate themselves as "average" or "just below average" whereas conversely, people who are below average tend to describe themselves as "Oh my God you should sooo see me I'm totally amazing". This is why men who describe themselves as fantastic lovers tend to stand nearer to the urinal if you know what I mean. This is why I've yet to build a house or fly a helicopter. I'm so convinced that it's as easy as it looks, that I'll either end up with something less watertight than a Government promise or as safe as a Californian sub-prime mortgage, circa 2006. What this means for my abilities at picking a winning horse at Ascot or avoiding accidentally swearing around children, two things I am amazingly terrible at in my opinion, is anyone's guess. Maybe the reason I'm not taking my other Range Rover to my private island is because I've yet to place a bet?

So despite your claims, you're not as good a driver as you claim to be, but I bet you're far better at whatever it is you claim to be dangerously bad at. No doubt for most of the guys out there, it'll be something like Ballet or flower-pressing. But whatever it is that you're not so good at, this means that you're in a great position to work hard to improve those skills.

Especially if it's Maths or English. If you boast about being unable to add the cost of a sandwich and a drink, let alone spell them, then you won't get any sympathy when it holds you back. Which it will.

(photos credited to Nuttakit)

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