A Career: Not Quite What It Used To Be

        I've abseiled down the front of a building in Milton Keynes that looks like a giant shoe, I've pulled a loop-de-loop in a small plane for fun, and I've even bared the uncharted territory that is a hen do, but there are few things that bring up as much trepidation as a job interview. Seriously, there are few things that make me worry more than having to find the right suit, doing some utterly pointless research on the company about their operating history and their turnover that bears no relevance to anything you're going to do there, which will probably be the guy who gets shouted at by clients every time there's a day in the week. You've then got to spend many wasted hours sitting in front of the mirror, perfecting your "interview smile". It needs to be somewhere in between Elvis-lip and psychopathic grin but not obviously fake. You also need to make sure that you don't turn up late, as this sits next to punching the interviewer in the face and suggesting that his wife was a "goer" in terms of bad interview etiquette. If I could redesign the world then I'd make sure, right after I remove wasps for being the single most useless insect ever, that I would simply be given a job based on some other medium. If they could make a brilliant cup of tea, then I see no reason not to make them the Managing Director, for example.

Read more...

Security Or Enjoyable: The Eternal Employment Dilemma

        Last week, I mentioned people who taste cat-food for a living, as well as people who climb 1,700ft poles to fix a flashing light without any safety ropes. I mentioned these because I thought they were the oddest jobs I could imagine. Well, it turns out I was wrong! Ever fancied being a hair boiler? No; how about the person who makes sure that shoes coming off a production line have no wrinkles in them? Don't think that'll be a good talking point at a party? How about the endless excitement and daily challenge of being a furniture tester? Why not be adventurous and dive for golf balls at the local golf course? It turns out that there's tons of crazy jobs out there, all as interesting, mind-numbing or socially awkward as each other. But, someone's got to do them, right? And considering golfball-man can make somewhere around £60,000-£70,000 a year, I bet there's a few people working in awful jobs who would happily hold their breath in return for being a higher-rate taxpayer. Possibly more if you decide to move to Florida and enjoy an added perk of the job: avoiding alligators. 

Read more...